The truth is I often find it incredibly difficult to just be myself around other people. There is an ever pervading tension in the background of my mind and it requires tremendous presence on my part to be fully expressive in the face of that tension. And it is only when I bring that fullness of being to myself that I am able to bring the fullness of myself to another. This is where true intimacy resides.
Kosha Joubert, whom I interviewed recently, shares that community is not comfortable. It is intimate. And intimacy is not comfortable. It’s powerful. The capacity for intimacy requires tremendous comfort with oneself. It requires that we show up with our full humanity, as we are, to engage with others, as they are, and through that elevate each other with deep mutual acceptance.
Kosha Joubert serves as Executive Director of the Global Ecovillage Network. She is an international facilitator, trainer, and consultant and has worked extensively in the fields of community empowerment, intercultural collaboration and the emergence of collective wisdom. Kosha is a co-founder of Gaia Education, which develops trainings at the cutting-edge of sustainability, and is the co-author of the internationally applied curriculum of the Ecovillage Design Education programs. She grew up in South Africa under Apartheid and has spent her life working to heal social divides and trauma.
Kosha speaks of the power of collective trauma transformation. How we can learn to truly hold space for others and support them when they are triggered. Instead of tensing up and responding with aggression, we can co-regulate by consciously relaxing our own nervous system.
She shares her philosophy on leadership, community building, and a concept she calls homecoming – a way of coming back to the deeply familiar, to nature, to our bodies, and to the planet.
This conversation overflows with wisdom and unique insight. Listening to it after our recording was a profoundly uplifting experience for me. Please enjoy.